Saturday, March 31, 2007

Sadie

Sadie is a most remarkable dog. Years ago when my son and his wife bought their house, they went to the pound and picked this dog.According to the vet, she is mostly German Shepperd with a little wolf ... maybe ... because of the eyes. Once she knows you are a friend, you are most welcome in the house. Immediately she started sleeping in the hall way outside the master bedroom.

When the twins were born, my son took the little hats home for Sadie to smell. The day the twins came home, Sadie started sleeping outside their room at night. The next day Marie and I went to visit. The twins were asleep in a Pack and Play thing (new to my generation). As I walked toward the Pack and Play, Sadie quietly walked between me and them so I could not approach them. Once my son told her it was OK, she moved out of the way. If one started to cry Sadie would go to an adult and she would emit a soft sound. They needed attention and she wanted to make sure they received it.

One morning my son walked out of his bedroom and wondered where Sadie had slept. When he came down the stairs, Sadie was laying in front of the door. No one had locked it the night before.

Usually when Marie or I walk in the house, Sadie comes looking for a dog biscuit. My son and his wife are disolving the marriage and he started the move today to his apartment. I had the biscuit ready. Sadie looked at me with the saddest eyes, her head was down and no wagging tail. She took the biscuit, but did not eat it. It just laid where she put it. Poor Sadie! I know she knows and she is sad.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Care giver

I have (willingly) become the main care giver for my wife as she battles the return of cancer. She is doubly challenged as she also lives with MS. The treatments have caused, at times, immense body ache.

I have become adept at several new skills and been humbled by what must (or should be) simple tasks. I'll start with my failures:

I CAN NOT twist a Thomas English muffin and get it to separate. The birds benefited from several tries. I threw in the towel! I now cut them with a bread knife. This has two benefits, I am not frustrated and I can cut it so 1/2 is thicker. Marie will only eat a half as her appetite is poor. At least it is a thick half.

I don't seem to have the knack for expertly loading the dish washer. It seems like I should get more in for each load. I seem to do more lodes than she did. Maybe I should hand wash some things. I will use machines to ease my work load.

For years I have always been disgusted by the sight of a wet tea bag ... don't know why but I am. I also dislike the smell of tea. Marie's morning routine is a cup of tea with a half teaspoon of honey and two (only) ice cubes. Marie has told me that the tea is the proper color...not too dark and definitely can't be too light. This balance has not come easily. I hate it when that little paper on the end of the string falls off and the string slides into the cup as I pour the water in the cup.

Menu selection is a constant struggle. I give credit to all those housewives who prepare dinner everyday with variety and nutritional value. It ain't easy. I am on a first name basis with the ladies behind the meat counter at the local meat market. They willingly pass on cooking tips and always ask about Marie. Even the local fishmonger has passed on tips as I try different varieties.

I do a nice pork, mushroom, and pea stew in red sauce, a very nice meatloaf. Steaks and chops are an easy standby. I bake fresh organic asparagus in the oven with crushed garlic and olive oil. Spinach and broccoli are good green vegetables. She likes baked sweet potatoes also. I could have done better with white fish. It needed to be cooked longer. I did a corn beef and cabbage last Sunday as we were away over St. Pats day. The weather is slowly getting better in Rhode Island so soon I can start grilling outside. Today I will roast a chicken.

Recently I received a notice for jury duty. Several years ago I had jury duty and enjoyed it. Unfortunately, I checked off that I needed to be excused. I need to drive Marie for weekly cancer treatments. I would have liked to do that again. It would have been costly. They pay $14.00 a day and parking is almost that much, plus travel, lunches.

I am thankful that I am retired and can afford to stay at home to be a full time caregiver. I am quick to laugh at my mistakes and have become very (95%) patient with my ailing wife and her demands. Today she wanted 1/3 of a banana. We have several, a third of a big one or a smaller one I asked. I got the look and picked one myself. I ate the last bite!

Next Tuesday, Marie starts a new regiment of chemo. The last chemo drug did not make the expected progress. We are positive and hopeful.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

An Anatomy of a Murder

A couple of weeks ago, we noticed in the TV Guide that An Anatomy of a Murder was going to be shown at an ungodly hour. We decided to tape it. Several years ago when we were making our Michigan tour of lighthouses, we booked a night in the Big Bay Lighthouse near Thunder Bay, Michigan. The light itself is managed by the USCG. The lighthouse is now a private B & B on Lake Superior. There were two choices for dinner, eat at the Lumberjack Tavern or drive 30 miles to Marquette and dodge the deer on the roadway after dusk on the return trip. We choose the Tavern. The connection to the movie is that the actual murder took place in this Tavern in the same room where we ate. The movie was shot in and around the area. At the time of the murder, the U S Army was training artillery units along the lake. The murder was committed by an Army officer after his wife told him she had been raped by the bartender-owner of the Tavern.

The film was shot in 1959 and the Thunder Bay Inn was used in the film. We walked around the Inn and it had not changed from the time of the movie. At the time the film was considered "risque". The legal significance is that this was the first successful defence using "temporary insanity" as a plea. The film leads you to believe that the Army officer was in full control and got away with murder. Although the movie is 2 1/2 hours long, it completely held our interest.

We enjoyed the stay at the lighthouse. The owner gave a talk on the history of the lighthouse and the keepers over the years. We can always say that we slept in a lighthouse. However, it was our dining at the Lumberjack Tavern that was really the highpoint.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Quick Trip South

It has been a daily grind since January 2ND. Every Monday a blood test for Marie to see if she is strong enough to take her Tuesday chemo treatment along with what they call a hu2 inhibitor. Not everyone has the right whatever to take Herceptin. Herceptin is not considered a chemo drug. It supposedly stops the cancer cells from dividing and multiplying. The chemo is three weeks followed by an off week. The Herceptin is every week. Oddly the side effects from the chemo drug were minimal. It is the other drug that causes severe body pain in 10% of the patients. This regiment was developed by Dana Farber in Boston for folks whose breast cancer has metastasized. After 10 weeks, a scan showed that this treatment was not having the desired effect. The Oncologist (who we like and respect) told us to take two weeks off and go somewhere. The body pain that my wife has experienced has been particularly severe in her legs, adding to her MS ills.

So we decided to go to the Outer Banks, a favorite place, and an easy two day drive for her. My wife had not been getting much exercise these past weeks due to the pain. As we traveled she was walking more as we stopped at rest areas, visitor centers, motels and restaurants. We had reserved a room at the new Hilton in Kitty Hawk. We had a straight on ocean view. A very nice upscale Hotel. Unfortunately our room was a hike from the elevator. Worse yet the king adjustable (so called) bed was horrible. We did tour the Wright Brothers memorial, Had a nice lunch at the Duck Deli, a dinner at Tortuga Lie and another at Sam and Omy's. Sam and Omy's is a local hangout for the fishermen and local folks. More bar than restaurant. I like it.

I was awaken on the third morning from a sound sleep before 5 AM. My wife was crying and in immense pain. I believe that the prior weeks of inactivity followed by a definite increase in activity had affected her legs. "I want to go home now" she cried. So I went about arranging an early checkout and acquiring reservations in Chincoteague, VA which would be a manageable 4 1/2 hour drive. She could barely walk with my support. The room in the Comfort Inn was great, comfortable bed, good inlet view, two door from the elevator. We were treated to much wildlife in the preserve as we drove around the loop. The next day we ran for Rhode Island.

This was the first trip we have made in the van that was purchased for the express use to travel to Florida for the winter. It proved to be a comfortable ride, spacious for luggage and stuff. Gas mileage was acceptable for a heavy box on wheels. We did get away for a few days. Her legs are getting stronger. She has gone from cane to a walker and needs a chair for a shower. The pain is easing.

This Friday we go back to the Oncologist and his associates to find out what the new treatment plan will be along with the side effects. Some heavy decisions will have to be made.

At least we had our time together for a few days in locales that have been special to us over the years as we begin the next treatment phase.